By: Andrea Mosby

I remember speaking to an audience of students at a University. I asked the audience how many friends they had on their Facebook page. One student proudly said, “I have over 895 friends.” I asked what are their middle names? He looked at me like a deer in the head lights. I realize we have all type of social media that connects us to people, but are we really being connected with people that can be a REAL friend. I always tell students “Facebook goes wide, but true friendship goes DEEP”.

I have a friend that has been in my life for over 25 years, and I can say I believe we were able to maintain our friendship over these years because when we first became friends we actually talked about what our expectations were for friendship. So often we allow people into our lives that perhaps aren’t good for us or they just don’t add to the future we want to build for our lives.

I may not have all the answers, but I think with a 25 year friendship, I might be able to give you a few tips on what to ask and look for to determine if you are willing to go DEEP and put in the time it takes to maintain a life long friend.

  1. Ask people what friendship means to them. Listen to see if you agree with their definition.
  2. Talk about the realities of friendship: Friends are going to have tough times; friends are going to get mad at each other; friends are going to disagree with important life issues; but friends can work through them and as friends, we can agree to disagree and not miss a beat with still caring for each other and respecting one another’s life views.
  3. Friends in no way go after each other current and/or future boy/girlfriends etc.
  4. Friends tell the truth to each other even when it’s not easy.

These are only a few items that can begin a great discussion and help in determining if we can go DEEP with a life-long Friendship or should I just hit the like button and add you as another Facebook “Friend”?

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